Friday, April 6, 2012 @ 6:10 AM 0 stares
So, I woke up at around 10 am because I slept 3 am watching videos which kinda left me crying like mad for idk hours. Just really annoyed when Naomi left Emily before summer vacation. and yeah its freaking fucking annoying as FFFFUUCCCCK! k. fuck
Ate corned beef for breakfast and listened to some new songs i’ve downloaded some nights ago. Seriously, I goota have lively music everyday so this body can stretch sometimes.
Lunch, then listened to musics at bed AGAIN and then fell asleep. Rigel woke me up for mass. I forced him to not join the acolytes since I dont wanna go mass alone. I didn’t took a bath cause its already 4 and gosh who knows when that mass will start with that bipolar priest. I decided to wear my skinnys and loose tee with matching havai. And that dogtag. yeah, that dogtag.
Arrived at church but stayed outside cause I saw Gio. Gio is my childhood friend, live near our block and graduated from Araneta. *Araneta Learning Center is where I graduated grade school and studied my 1st and 2nd HS years. 3rd and 4th at Saint Francis Academy and yeah where all bullshits happened.* We talked and talked and gosh I forgot I’ve never talked to Gio for like so many years already. His mom and mine are great DMI sisters and that quite made us close, too.
I went looking for my highschool barkadas but failed. I was hoping to see Ayn Rand so that I can hangout these days but again, failed. Syvelle too, whose going to celebrate her 19th this Tuesday and I dont know what to give to her. Im so broke at the moment.
Mass ended. Patay gutom mn ko so, I bought Tempura which me and Patrick, a childhood gay as in gayish boyfie of mine, shared. We quite had weird experiences with Patrick since his dad would always tease me to him. But I guess, he probably know why me and Patrick didn’t work out. It was me and Patrick who transferred at the same year at SFA but unfortunately he was placed in Sec B and I, on A. I actually envy his butt awhile ago. I mean he used to be this skinny gay who’s always clumsy and loves to sing. Idk what happened to him but he’s a fat-ass now.
Bought some nail polish “neon amarillo” char and colorless one. Annndd, painted my nails again with frozen purple. Puffed a bit at the veranda while waiting for that reply. *imissyou* AMAW! Called faye cause imiissher but seem occupied, too. Texted dearie but was on an BISITA IGLESIA.
And, still waiting for the reply. :|
Wednesday, April 4, 2012 @ 6:12 AM 0 stares
Tuesday, April 3, 2012 @ 6:14 AM 0 stares
so my original plan was just lay in my bed the whole day and pretend its not RELEASING FUCKING GRADES DAY at my school. But since I received a “goodmorning love” msg, so watever, my day is complete, nevermind. Thought of going to the city so douche won’t get mad but I think she did. She went mad after me leaving her without even saying “adios douche, Im going provincia na”, stay at her house for a pizza and talk about her tantrums about her gf having a summer job. So most likely, thats what I usually do before going back here. imy Janne Lachica.
Texted mamita if she would be so kind to just do the work and just text me my grades along with Yel. Im loving Yel now by the way. She’s not the weird girl anymore with that squeky voice who seem to work in cartoon network. [ well thats what I thought, can’t blame myself. FYI EVERYBODY THINKS OF HER THAT WAY].
Last Friday Passed HealthCare
Today
12:34 pm Passed ORGANIC CHEM at last! [INYERFACE LIBRES!] thanks to Sir Guino for all the chances of cheats. lol See yo in BIOCHEM sir!
3:57 pm ohforfuckssake PASSED STATISTICS. [ Pendang was quite fc calling me “PEPS” and “LOBIN YA” and thinking yeah he’ll pass me cause he’s obviously checkinmeout lol . HAHA]From 3.3 to 2.8 FTW yeah im proud of me.
and some minor subjects that I’ll pass anyways cause they’re MINOR?? And idk if I should be excited for lab mgt or be worried but hey, i did great on those small tests and that finals! So yeah, LAB MGT YOU BETTER LET ME PASS!
Friday, March 16, 2012 @ 8:48 AM 0 stares
So she broke up with me. END
So tired from that mind-blowing Pre-Fi and depressed cause I think everything is not in right condition. What happened last Friday was frankly unexpected from you. You completely despise me that much that you cant stand my prescence. I haven't even received any replies or calls from you for 3 days .At first thought, you were like that for 2 months and yeah I understand that. You got afraid, so you distance yourself. Im not actually mad for giving me those promises, Im just sad that I kinda felt worthless. You should have told me from the start so that I won't be feeling this expectations shattering.
You said that nothing would change but its like I dont know you anymore. I expected a lot from you cause I thought I deserve that kind of love. It makes me so sad cause I felt like I lost a sister.
"But with all honest, you were the only one that made me special that way. I'll never forget you, EVER. Thanks for everything. You’re the only person that ever made me feel anything, really feel. Even if it wasn’t always the best of feelings, you’re the only one who could make me smile or tear me down in three seconds flat. You’re the only person that can drive me crazy, in both good and bad ways. You’re the only person that ever made me feel like I didn’t have to try so hard. I could have fight for the two of us but I dont have the guts anymore. "
ILOVEYOUSOMUCH... so so much.
Friday, February 17, 2012 @ 6:22 AM 0 stares
Should have said, NO.
Should have stayed just the same.
If you’re afraid to fall hard for someone cause they might leave you, then don’t!
“Love is all about risks. Di diay ka mu risk pra nako?”
you once told me that and now you’re telling me right in my face that YOU’RE LIMITING YOURSELF KAY YOU’RE SCARED THAT I’LL LEAVE YOU LIKE ANYBODY ELSE DID? Then whats the point of this relationship???? Palibhasa, you didn’t lose someone very special and the next day everything just changed. Your life turned dead too as each day goes by. I don’t want to lose someone special to me again. And yeah, you’re special.
@ 6:18 AM 0 stares
I thought Im done with this feeling, but hey DISREGARDED we’ve meet again! People are the same no matter what, they’re all the same. They tell you you’ll get more closer when your in relationship but how come mine always fail? Why do I feel lonelier when in a relationship than when Im single?
I just don’t really get this at all.
@ 6:14 AM 0 stares
Im here sitting under these shade, looking at the stars above. The night is so gloomy, perfect time to smoke and kill my lungs again. Thinking, confused of what I did. Done with valentines.
So Im in a relationship again, for the 2nd time. Everything’s been quite nice and awesome with her. I feel like everyday is just pure bliss knowing that she’s there. Calling every night just to talk, txting every minute just to see if Im fine and finding any time just to hug and kiss. But that was a year ago, 2011.
Its 2012 by the way, and yeah we got official on JANUARY 3 right after new year. For some reason, the closeness went away. The distance went in. I felt stupid and betrayed. Days passed and I asked her why everything changed. “I’m scared to death that you’ll just leave me hanging there like I don’t mean to you. I don‘t want to be hurt.” After reading the text msg, everything just went soft and I found myself crying. I couldn’t help myself no matter how hard I try to control my emotions. Crying right after the mass and at Mang Inasal in front of Ramon and Mikee made me a weakling. Everything just crushed down.
Days passed, she said how sorry she was and I understand that. I just don’t get why EVERYTHING CHANGED. Im a very particular person and I usually notice every details of a person but If I were to choose, I THINK I’LL RATHER NOT BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND IF THIS IS JUST GOING TO BE ALWAYS. I’d rather stay on those days where you still call me every night, hug and hug and hug me, txt and reply me immediately, ask for my whereabouts, smile and sing for me, worry if I don’t reply, say good morning and good night, say IMISSYOU and ILOVEYOU and other things that I really really missed about you and, WE‘RE STILL FRIENDS. I wish you never changed at all, but you did.